Episode•December 12, 2022•1h 14m

Twitter Spaces Replay 12/5 | Ep. 178

Every Monday at 9 PM exclusively on Twitter, Tiffany hosts a Space called FinNoir: A Space for Black Money Talk. This Space features a variety of black voices in personal finance to give their perspectives, information, and thoughts on money topics that affect the black community. This session discusses not feeling worthy of financial stability. How that unworthiness has shown up in our lives, and what we did about it. Hosts: Tiffany Grant & Rahkim Sabree Speakers: Markia Brown, Steven Stack, Camari Ellis, Nia Adams, Jonathan Thomas, Renita Young, Tamika Howell, Anthony Weaver This podcast uses the following third-party services for analysis: Podcorn - https://podcorn.com/privacy OP3 - https://op3.dev/privacy

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Key Takeaways

1
Financial unworthiness often stems from trauma and manifests as self-sabotage in spending, pricing, and goal-setting.
Speakers shared personal stories of panic when making purchases for themselves despite preaching financial literacy.
Trauma from childhood (single-parent households, financial abuse) creates patterns of hoarding cash or undervaluing services.
Imposter syndrome appears even among experts when facing new financial milestones like leasing cars or hiring help.
2
Community and external validation are essential tools for overcoming feelings of unworthiness.
Rakim emphasized how group support helps reflect accomplishments back to individuals who struggle to see their own progress.
Nia described becoming a 'cheerleader' for others and intentionally modeling self-prioritization to break generational patterns.
Multiple speakers credited Twitter Spaces and peer accountability for normalizing the conversation around financial trauma.
3
Healing financial trauma is an ongoing process of awareness and navigation rather than complete erasure.
Rakim explained that the brain cannot distinguish between past trauma and present triggers, so the goal is mindful response.
Tiffany noted that resolving one money issue often surfaces new ones; the key is recognizing the pattern and returning to basics like budgeting.
Markeia reframed success as learning coping skills and moving through setbacks rather than expecting permanent immunity.
4
Celebrating wins—big and small—is a deliberate practice that counters trauma-driven self-doubt.
Rakim committed to publicly celebrating victories in 2023 after realizing he rarely paused to acknowledge progress.
Tiffany maintains a Notion page of features and wins to revisit during content slumps or low-confidence periods.
Nia recommends a 'win jar' where individuals physically store notes of accomplishments for future reflection.
5
Entrepreneurs with unworthiness issues often underprice services and avoid big opportunities.
Nia highlighted how self-doubt leads to lowballing rates and talking oneself out of high-value client work.
Markeia described hyperventilating after purchasing a necessary iMac for her business due to ingrained guilt around self-investment.
Speakers agreed that pricing confidence requires unlearning messages from childhood and financial abuse.

Intro

This episode is a replay of the December 5 Twitter Space 'FinNoir: A Space for Black Money Talk' focused on the topic of not feeling worthy of financial stability.
Hosted by Tiffany Grant and Rahkim Sabree with a panel of Black personal finance creators and professionals sharing lived experiences around financial trauma, self-worth, and healing.

Tiffany Grant Rahkim Sabree Markia Brown Steven Stack Nia Adams

– Opening the Conversation on Unworthiness

Nia introduces the topic after seeing students struggle with homeownership readiness and feeling they don't belong in money spaces.

I feel like it stems from different traumas and experiences that we've all had in our lives. And those things kind of trickle into our money habits.
– Nia Adams

– Rahkim's Car Leasing Anxiety Story

Rahkim describes intense anxiety before visiting a dealership, expecting to buy out his old lease or finance, only to be offered a new lease with waived fees.

When I was driving home... I was like, man, I don't even deserve a new car. Like, I'm not making the money that I should be making.
– Rahkim Sabree

He credits community support for helping him recognize accomplishments instead of defaulting to imposter syndrome.

– The Stories We Tell Ourselves

Tiffany emphasizes that negative mental narratives often create panic that leads to poor decisions. She advocates shifting to 'positive autopilot' through awareness.

It's a lot of mental. And I feel like that gets a lot looked over.
– Tiffany Grant

– Markeia's Financial PTSD and Forced Self-Help Books

Markeia recounts being assigned Suze Orman and Dave Ramsey books during her 'rough period' in the military, which failed to address the realities of her community or credit trauma.

I kept talking myself out of it month after month... I was hyperventilating because I just pushed checkout on this damn iMac.
– Markeia Brown

She questions whether people ever truly overcome spending guilt on themselves.

– Trauma as a Moment in Time – Rahkim's Framework

Rahkim explains that trauma is a fixed moment the brain cannot erase; the work is learning to recognize safety and respond mindfully rather than reactively.

Fearlessness is an illusion... We all experience fear. But there are those of us who learn how to navigate those feelings.
– Rahkim Sabree

– Tiffany's Monthly Budget Reset Ritual

Even after reaching relative stability, Tiffany still experiences first-of-the-month panic and returns to zero-based budgeting for relief and clarity.

I had to go back to basics and say, OK, look at your budget... and when I did that, I felt an automatic relief.
– Tiffany Grant

– Nia's 'Year of Me' After Raising Her Daughter Alone

Nia shares going five years without buying herself winter boots or a coat while prioritizing her growing daughter, then intentionally practicing selfishness in 2021.

It took the full year for me to do that. And now it comes naturally to me, but it was a process.
– Nia Adams

– Ronnie's Single-Parent Household Ambition and Scarcity

Ronnie describes how watching his mother work multiple jobs created extreme ambition but also caused him to miss early investment opportunities due to fear of spending capital.

– Hiring Trauma and Contractor vs. Employee Mindset

Tiffany and Kamari discuss the fear of hiring full-time employees because of uncertainty about sustaining payroll, rooted in cash-flow volatility from entrepreneurship.

– Celebrating Wins and the 'I Love Me Book'

Rahkim, Tiffany, and Markeia share systems: Notion win trackers, physical win jars, and military-style 'I Love Me' books to document accomplishments for future motivation and negotiations.

Don't let us celebrate you more than you celebrate you.
– Rahkim Sabree

– Steven Stack on Positive Upbringing and the $2M Opportunity

Steven credits his parents and a family friend for instilling royalty-level self-belief, yet still hesitated on a major 2014 opportunity due to lingering self-doubt that cost significant gains.

– Financial Abuse and Survivor Patterns

Markeia details being financially controlled in a previous marriage and how it created lasting difficulty spending on herself or trusting her ability to provide for others.

Books Mentioned

The Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey
Rich Dad Poor Dad by Robert Kiyosaki
The 9 Steps to Financial Freedom by Suze Orman

Resources

Topics

Financial TraumaSelf-WorthImposter SyndromeBlack Personal FinanceHealing & TherapyEntrepreneurship Community SupportCelebrating WinsFinancial AbuseMindset